


Louie Makes a Porno

by GunneryKnight



Category: American Actor RPF, British Actor RPF, Louie (TV), Real Person Fiction
Genre: Blow Jobs, M/M, Non-Linear Narrative, Older Characters, Stereotypes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-04
Updated: 2016-01-04
Packaged: 2018-05-11 15:27:09
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,115
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5631544
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GunneryKnight/pseuds/GunneryKnight
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Finally gonna put your money where your mouth is" he asked, as devilish grin played on his lips.</p><p>Based on the bit done by Louis CK and Ewan McGregor's reaction on Conan.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Louie Makes a Porno

“I think the most sexually unappealing people in the world, are old gingers,” Louie paused for the laughs that came naturally from his audience “I’m serious guys like you’d never see someone old and fat like more or even an old skinny ginger like Bill Burr…well unless it was a snuff film…”

***

Louie was in his apartment bathroom shitting just enjoying the feeling of his shit leave his body. A short paradise while his two daughters ate their breakfast and watched some shitty cartoon.

The doorbell rang Louie sighed cursing, of course when he was in the middle of a shit someone would show up, getting up from the toilet he was intercepted by his little girl “Papa, there is a pirate at the front door” Jane said her mouth full of cereal. Louie blinked at her in disbelief “oh honey got sit at the table” he said as he moved to the front door to see a man in a pirate shirt.

“Hello~” the man said effeminately he was wearing a white pirate shirt that had blue stripes, tight leather pants and a monstrosity of a haircut: a flattop with finger waves and a French braid that just hanged in the back.

“Uh hi,” Louie said confused “I’m sorry who are you?” The effeminate man gasped in faux horror. “I am the great Art Porn director…Pier De Dungeon” he pressed the fingers of his limped wristed right hand against his chest. ‘Art Porn director pretentious as shit is more like pretentious asshole’ it Louie thought to himself.

“Oh cool but my daughters are here so I really can’t discuss this right now” Louie said looking at his daughters who were peaking from the dinner table at the weird man at the door. He looked back at Pier, who pouted “fine then here is my business card visit me,” he pulled out a business card and handed it to Louie “I promise you will make a lot of money.” 

***

“Okay go in that room, and we will start filming~” he gave a limp wristed shooing motion with both of his hands. “Uh aren’t we supposed to like prep or…something” Louie asked scratching his neck. Pier sighed turning to look at Louie with a critical eyes “Would have been better if you at least tried to dress professionally.”

“Professionally? For a porn shoot? Aren’t my clothes coming off anyway?” Louie questioned. Pier’s rolled his eyes with a lip smack to boot “It doesn’t matter now get your bitch ass in that room.”

As Louie entered the darkly lit room, the door behind him closed, he stopped awkwardly turning back to jiggle the door knob. “Uh hello? The…the door is locked” he looked for a camera or a window but there was none near the large black door. ‘What did I get myself into, I’m such an idiot’ Louie thought cursing himself. There was a rustle behind himself and Louie froze unsure what would happen next ‘oh god please don’t tell me is a black guy with a monster cock’ he thought as he looked back. Louie’s mouth dropped in shock as the other person made themselves visible stepping into the mood lighting it was, Ewan McGregor 

“Hello,” Ewan said with a smile his Scottish accent making that simple word sound like honey to Louie “I think you’re really funny.” Louie nodded shyly he looked away while Ewan appraised him silently. Louie was momentarily lost for words trying to push his awkwardness down. 

Ewan moved dangerously close to Louie, who was trapped between Ewan and the curtains that were randomly draped around the room. A burning feeling rising in his chest as Ewan spoke again "Finally gonna put your money where your mouth is" he said as devilish grin played on his lips.

“How do we wanna do this?” Louie asked looking around. Ewan opened his mouth to speak, but nothing came out he closed it thinking hard to himself. “I really don’t know because I’m married, and she’d cut my balls off if I slept with another person” he rubbed the back of his neck.

“You could call her?” Louie offered as he shifted un-comfortably his long-sleeve black shirt extenuating his belly.

“Call her…to ask her if I could fuck you?” Ewan asked confused.

“Or if I can fuck you” Louie offered hopefully.

“Well it’s worth a shot” he said with a shrug digging his phone out of his expensive jacket.

“You look amazing” Louie blurted awkwardly, which made Ewan smile, thanking him then finished texting his wife. Ewan moved back into Louie’s personal space Louie wanted to kiss Ewan on his handsome face. Louie leaned in and kissed Ewan, who was shocked still until he figured that he should just go with it. Ewan is happy to relax into the kiss, his hands coming up slip around the back of Louie's neck. Louie likes the way Ewan kisses, slow and unhurried but forceful, his fingers gripping at Ewan’s shirt like he's dying. It feels like forever, drool dripping from his chin.

His phone beeped “Huh,” Ewan said in dull surprise “she said okay, but she wants pictures” Louie blinked in surprise not expecting his wife to be that cool about a gay encounter with her husband. 

“Well guess you can’t use that ‘never sucked a dick’ joke again” Ewan slipped his phone back into his jacket, sliding it of quickly, he dropped it on the ground before grabbing onto Louie. 

***

Ewan liked how Louie looked on his knees in front of him, sucking on his cock. Ewan took out his phone to get a picture “your pretty good at this” he whispered hotly slurring as he dug his back further against the wall of curtains. 

With a violent gasp, Ewan came hard he pushed Louie’s head back so he could watch the cum splatter and cover his pale freckled face. “Guess its mine turn now” Ewan murmured, and he knelt down between Louie’s spread legs his hard cock pressed tightly against his jeans. With gusto Ewan swallowed him whole gagging slightly as he bobbed his head up and down.

Louie was already on the edge way before Ewan started to blow him. With a violent shuddering gasp Louie came hard he pushed Louie’s head back so he could watch the cum cover his handsome face.

There was a long silence between the two of them as they sat on the floor to the empty room. “Hey,” Louie said catching Ewan’s attention “wanna got get a slice of pizza, I know a place.”

“That would be grand” Ewan smiled sending another shiver down Louie’s back ‘gorgeous’ he screamed in his head.


End file.
